Lost but not Forgotten
by Riveting Red Pants
Summary: After the angels took the Ponds (oh yeah spoliers), the Doctor asks the TARDIS to take him where he needs to go. Where he needs to go ends up being a week with a little Pond girl.
1. Chapter 1

** I felt the need for a long feelsy Doctor Who fic, so . . . enjoy my loves! I actually just got a job writing for a visual novel so I might not be updating with stories **_**as**_** often, but I promise I won't forget. Really I should be writing for that right now . . . but who was callin' my name.**

The Doctor dropped River off at some odd location, wanting to hug her to him for as long as he possibly could. He wished she would stay. She was the last of the Ponds he had left. As she left the TARDIS it was as if the room suddenly got colder, darker. The last of that Pond energy exiting his life once again. He crumbled to the floor, sitting with his back slumped and his head down. They were gone. They were all gone. Really and truly gone. His best friend . . . the doctor suddenly pounced up and started pushing and pulling random levers, not caring what they did or where they took him. He slumped against the console once again, tears stinging his eyes.

"You told me once that you would take me where I needed to go. Take me there now. Take me to wherever it is that will make this pain go away." He begged his wonderful girl. "Please!" He half moaned half cried out. The weight in his hearts was so heavy he felt it hard to breathe. Every time he closed his eyes he saw her.

_"Goodbye raggedy man."_ He formed his hands into fists and shoved them into his eyes.

"No no no no!" She couldn't be gone. She couldn't be. Not his Pond. The whooshing of the engines stopped, the rocking chaotic motion of the TARDIS stilled. The doctor looked up towards the doors as they opened, somehow. They weren't supposed to do that. A little figure stuck it's head in. The doctor squinted.

"Doctor? You came back!" A familiar voice sounded. The doctor recognized it instantly.

"Pond?"

"DOCTOR!" the little girl ran at him and flung her arms around his neck. She didn't seem to care about the TARDIS being bigger on the inside; she didn't care that it would take her wherever she wanted to go, whenever she wanted to go. She only cared about one thing: that her raggedy man was there for her. He hugged her back and buried his face in her shoulder, squeezing her tighter than he probably should have. "Doctor . . . were you . . .crying?" The doctor straightened up and wiped his eyes on his palms.

"I . . ." how do you tell your best friend she just died?

"Are you okay?" Little Amelia Pond asked, wiping some more of his tears off with a tiny finger.

"Better now that you're here." The doctor smiled.

"AMELIA!" someone shouted from outside the TARDIS.

"Who's that?"

"My aunt." Amy said, sounding worried and slightly annoyed.

"Oh . . ."

"Come on, she gets annoyed when I don't come when I'm called." The doctor nodded and straightened his bow tie and exited the TARDIS, Amy pulling his hand. They closed the TARDIS door and went inside the old house. A rather portly woman stood at the sink washing potatoes.

"Amelia it is almost Dinner time!" She blabbed, not even bothering to look up at the young girl. "Wash up! Now!" She shouted in a shrill voice.

"Auntie . . ."

"What is it this time child, can't you see I'm busy?"

"Auntie this is my friend, the doctor." Auntie finally looked up and was shocked.

"Dear God. So you do exist."

"The doctor smiled and held a hand out."

"Nice to meet you Auntie." She didn't even bother to shake his hand.

"Get a place set for him girl. Chop chop!" she shouted at little Amy, who rolled her eyes at the doctor and did as she was told. It was odd to see her still doing that. What she was told. Grown up Amy never did. Dinner was served. Boiled potatoes with some dry sort of grey meat. The doctor did his best to try a little of everything, even though it was all disgusting. He was too emotional right now to be himself and spit it down the sink, cursing the wench that brought it to him. He couldn't afford to be kicked out. Not today. He needed to see little Amelia Pond there, smiling her charming Scottish smile and playing with her food, her face lighting up every time she looked at the doctor. Auntie did nothing but blabber about her upcoming trip to France the very next day.

"I was just going to leave her here alone, but since you're here, you'll look after her won't you? I'll only be gone a week." The doctor was stunned.

"But . . . you just met me?" Auntie stopped in her tracks.

"So? I'm not asking you to marry me sweetheart. I'm asking you to watch the brat." The doctor's brow furrowed.

"But . . . how do you know I'm a responsible adult?"

"Any adult is better than none at all." Auntie boomed, laughing a hideous laugh. The doctor scrunched his nose up. He did not like this woman, not one bit. She wasn't at all concerned with Amelia's safety. All she cared about was herself. But he looked over at little Pond's bright eyed face,

"Oh please doctor? It would be so much fun! Please couldn't you just take a week off?" The doctor sighed and nodded.

"Yes. Yes of course I'll watch over her for a week." The doctor agreed. What was he getting himself into?


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"DOCTOR! DOCTOR WAKE UP! WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!" Something shouted from near his head. He blinked his eyes groggily open. Since when did he actually sleep? He didn't need sleep. What was this? He sat up and saw a little Amy jumping up and down holding a kite. "Auntie's gone! Let's go!" The doctor ran a hand through his mussed thick hair and yawned.

"Go where?" He asked, thinking of all the places he could take her in his TARDIS, but Amy had something simpler in mind.

"There's this hill, and it's so windy outside, and it's the perfect day for a kite! My dad was always going to teach me how to fly one but . . . he never . . ." She stopped and the doctor got a sense of what exactly she didn't say, couldn't find the words for.

"Well of course we'll go fly a kite." He bopped her nose with his finger. Her face lit up again. "Don't you think you should eat something first?" He asked her.

"Fish fingers?"

"And custard." He finished. "Race you there." The ran around the house, the doctor, of course, tripping over his own feet and landing on his face, Amy lost in a fit of giggles, ran to the kitchen just to proclaim her win and then ran back to help her clumsy raggedy man to his feet. They ate breakfast and planned out their day. "Right, so kite flying on the hill!"

"Hide and go seek in the forest!"

"Queens and knights after lunch!"

"And then we can build a fort! I can build the best forts!" She screamed, so excited she was practically shaking.

"That is where you're wrong Pond, I happen to build the best forts. Won two championships on the intergalactic planet of Conond." He said, proudly. She giggled.

"What is Conond?"

"Well, it's a planet. You've never heard of Conond? Surely I told you about it . . ." he trailed off, remembering this Amy wasn't yet _Amy._ This was Amelia. Totally different incarnations of the same person.

"_Goodbye raggedy man."_

The doctor gasped, his mind suddenly not here, sitting in the English countryside planning out a day of adventure with the child version of his best friend. Suddenly his mind was there, in the graveyard.

"_I will never see you again!"_

_ "I'll be fine . . ."_

It was as if all the air left the room. He was left gasping, tears burning his eyes. _NO NO NO NO! _ She couldn't be gone. She was right here. Amy was right here, right now. She had run around the table and stood next to him, placing one tiny hand on his back.

"Doctor? Are you alright? Doctor!" She brought him back to the present. Or the past, if that's how you want to look at it. He straightened up.

"What? Yeah . . . fine." He mumbled, wiping his eyes again. How much was he going to cry? He hated crying.

"You're crying again. Doctor what's wrong?"

"Amy . . . I . . . You wouldn't understand. I'm fine. Let's go fly that kite eh?" He attempted a smile. Amy looked at him suspiciously.

"Okay . . ."

They had a marvelous day. They did fly that kite, and then the doctor tripped over a rock and let go of the string and the wind carried it away, but it was too funny for them to care. They played hide and seek, until the doctor felt started to panic because Amy was far too good at hiding and it was like he had lost her all over again and was running through the woods searching for her. He needed a break after that. They went back home and had lunch, more fish fingers with more custard. And then played pretend, Amy was, of course, queen, and the doctor was a part of the cybermen race, attempting to attack her castles and assimilate her. Of course he lost. Then they built a massive fort, and stayed inside the rest of the afternoon, coloring pictures with crayons (Amy drew a lovely TARDIS he was sure the old girl would love) and reading fairytales (the pandorcia story was a little eerie now that he understood it better) and the doctor told Amy stories he hadn't yet told her, ones he had been meaning to but hadn't gotten the chance. Ones of beautiful planets, adventures he'd had, creatures he'd encountered, lessons he'd learned. And soon, he looked over and realized Amy had fallen asleep, cuddled against him. He kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight Pond." Gradually, he fell asleep too.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"Amy let's go on an adventure."

"Where to?"

"Anywhere. Everywhere. Anytime." He told her. They were both hanging upside down on the couch, their hair flying up and pooling on the floor, even the doctor's. (It was a short couch).

"There's a carnival in town this weekend. I've always wanted to go to the carnival!" She said, joyous.

"I love carnivals!" He exclaimed, attempting to sit up. "LET'S GO!" In his excitement the doctor's feet flipped over his head and he landed on the floor with a pained groan. Amy just giggled.

"You ought to be more careful."

"What's the point in being careful? That's not living!" They got dressed; it was slightly chilly outside today so, in an attempt to be a responsible adult, the doctor made Amy wear her warmer clothes, a thick coat and a scarf, with her little knit hat on top. He just wore what he normally did, his tweed suit and suspenders, bow tie in perfect order. They raced into town to the carnival, (The doctor thought it would be better than taking the TARDIS). When they got there he bought them tickets and ice cream. He handed little Amy hers, and then something caught his eye. A carnival game where people were shooting aliens.

"HEY!" he shouted at the carnival worker. "Hey that's not very nice!" The aliens were green with big bug eyes and little spaceships. The kids at the game cheered as one shot an alien's head off. "What did they ever do to you?" The doctor asked. Amy tugged at his sleeve, sensing his annoyance.

"Doctor, it's only a game."

"This . . . This is a _game!?_ Teaching children to shoot things because they are different than them?" He was getting really angry now. It was this kind of "game" that had children growing up to make disastrous and judgmental mistakes. Mistakes that got people killed. That got his friends killed. "You should shut this down immediately!" The doctor screamed at the carnival worker. The kids playing looked at each other worried, and then ran off.

"Hey man, I just run the game. I didn't design it."

"Typical. You won't take any responsibility!"

"Doctor!"

"Shut it down this instant!" The doctor demanded. Normally he wouldn't be this angry about a silly carnival game. But his emotions were getting the better of him.

"I can't do that sir!" The doctor took out his sonic screwdriver and pointed it right at the game and pressed a button. The sonic-y sound was emitted. "Hey! What th-," and with that the game exploded. "HEY!" the carnival worker shouted. Amy was yanking, tugging, and pulling on the Doctor now, trying to drag him, seething, away. Finally she managed to get him away from the booth.

"Doctor why did you do that!? It's just a game! I know it was wrong, but you can't just go about destroying everything you don't like in this world, or there would be none of it left!"

"Amy you don't understand! People that encourage this kind of thought in children . . . those children grow up to hurt real people. Real living things. They grow up to chain them up . . .and torture them . . .and make them so mad that they hurt people and . . ." The doctor saw the fat man in his grotesque mansion in New York. He saw the tortured angel. This was all his fault. The Ponds were gone because of him. Because of that stupid little man who didn't know better than to destroy things he didn't understand.

"Doctor?"

"AMY JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" He screamed, pressing his hands to the sides of his head. "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND!" He shouted. She jumped, dropping her ice cream on the ground, tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Doctor I'm just trying to help!" But she couldn't help. How can you help someone who is grieving when they don't know who you're grieving for? How can you tell someone trying to help you that you are grieving over their death? This Amy is not _his_ Amy. This is little Amy. She doesn't understand everything yet. She doesn't understand him. She won't for a very long time, and that Amy . . . Well she was gone forever now. She left him.

"JUST RUN AWAY AMY! JUST RUN LIKE YOU WILL ANYWAYS!" Amy burst into tears and did just that. She ran away from him.

He sat on the ground, twiddling with his sonic, and thinking. She left him. Why would she leave him? She was his best friend. He thought of Rory, disappearing right before her. He hadn't even gotten to say goodbye to him. Rory was so brave, so selfless. Maybe _that's_ why Amy left him. He had never wanted to be Rory; he had always wanted to be as selfless as him though. He had never wanted Amelia's affections, just her friendship. He thought fondly of the time she had thrown herself at him. He chuckled and then realized he was crying again. How could one Time Lord cry so much? It seemed impossible. How did his body generate this many tears? Disgusting. He should probably go find Amy and apologize. He shouldn't have yelled at her. The sound of engines whooshed nearby and he sat up straight. He got up and rushed towards them, knowing that sound like he knew that the earth revolved around the sun. That was his TARDIS. When he found her she was just vanishing, and little Amy was sitting on a bench, licking a new cone of ice cream, her eyes still a little puffy and red from crying. He sat on the bench next to her in awe. What had just happened?

"Where did you get the new ice cream?" He asked her.

"Some weird lady gave it to me."

"What did she look like?" He asked her, starting to get an idea of what it was that had happened.

"She had a funny dress on. A night dress and red hair." The doctor remembered that good night. The night with his beloved friend.

"What did she tell you?" He asked her softly.

"She said 'cheer up kid, have an ice cream." The Doctor nodded slowly. So then. The saddest day of Amy's life. Him shouting at her, and her dropping her ice cream because of it. She hadn't ever told him anything about him shouting.

"Amy I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I shouldn't have ever yelled at you. I'm just very sad because . . . Because I've just lost someone I love very much, and you remind me a little of her." He said, veering close to dangerous territory. Amy looked up at him and then produced a second ice cream that he hadn't even noticed she had been holding.

"The weird lady told me to give this to you too. She said that you should cheer up as well." The doctor took the ice cream, his favorite kind, and smiled sadly. Even now Amy was giving him peace and happiness.

"Can you ever forgive me?" Amy smiled up at the doctor.

"I already have."


	4. Chapter 4

**Okie Dokie, here's chapter Four. I've already gotten the last one written out, I'm just working on the in between chapters. Please feel free to review, and let me know what you think. **

**Chapter 4**

"Amy!" Someone shouted from the outside of the door, pounding on it. The doctor looked up from the soufflé he was attempting to make and towards the door. Amy hopped down off the counter to go and get it.

"No Amy let me! I am the adult. I should answer the door yeah?" Amy smiled and nodded.

"I think that's what adults do. But it's probably just Rory. He's this really annoying boy who sometimes comes over." The doctor hesitated. Rory the Roman. Was he ready for this? Probably not. But he went to the door and opened it anyway. Amy peered out at Rory from behind the Doctor.

"And who might you be young man?" Rory suddenly looked nervous, not at all the Roman he had become. The doctor forgot sometimes that Rory wasn't always as brave, he had started small. He had always had a capacity for understanding though; the doctor admired that about him. And Rory had had the biggest heart of anyone he knew.

"I-I'm Rory." He stuttered. "Is Amy here?" The doctor smiled down at little Rory and opened the door wider.

"Come on in Rory. We were just baking a soufflé."

"Well trying to anyways." Amy giggled. "Rory this is the doctor."

"You're . . . You're real?" Rory asked his tone full of amazement.

"I get that a lot." The doctor grinned and ran back to the kitchen to finish folding the batter, his pink apron covered in flour and egg and milk. Amy grabbed Rory's hand and pulled him along too. "Come along Ponds!" He shouted over his shoulder, cringing when he realized that hadn't happened yet. Maybe they wouldn't notice.

"Did he just call us Ponds?" Rory asked, Amy shrugged.

"Who cares? Come on!" She shouted. Rory, as always, followed her. The doctor was trying his hardest to hold it together, but seeing Rory just aroused his feelings of grief even further. He hadn't just lost Amy, after all. He had lost his best mate as well.

"So do you really have a time machine?" Rory asked him. The doctor thought about the best way to go about this.

"Erm . . . I . . ." He didn't want to create any paradoxes. But he supposed just him being here was risk enough.

"Do you kill aliens?" Amy's eyes widened, thinking back to yesterday. The doctor stopped what he was doing. He set down the rubber spatula and the bowl, and walked slowly over to Rory, he knelt down in front of him. Rory looked frightened, Amy looked worried.

"Rory Williams, I do not kill. I save people, I fix things. That's why I'm called the doctor. I travel around space and time and heal as much as I can. I try to be a good guy."

"And don't good guys kill things?"

"Never." The doctor told him, conviction ringing in his voice. Even if all he was saying wasn't technically true. He had killed plenty of things in his time, but that wasn't something to tell a child. Especially if this could have an outcome on whom Rory became. The doctor smiled. "Want to help with the soufflé?" Rory nodded shyly. The soufflé turned out disastrous, as did most of the Doctor's soufflés, so they just laughed and decided to walk into town to get ice cream. On the way Rory was full of all kinds of questions.

"Can we go in your time machine?"

"Erm . . . Not today." The doctor decided, thinking it might be best not to disrupt the time stream any more than he already was. He frowned. Since when did he take caution into consideration? What was he becoming? An adult? He shuddered. Gross.

"But it is real yeah? The Tarderus?" The doctor stopped walking.

"Rory, she's called the TARDIS. And yes she's real."

"Oh. Sorry." Rory mumbled, looking down at the ground.

"Can we play make believe when we get back to the house?" Amy asked, bored with the current conversation.

"Why wait till we get back? Let's play now?" Amy looked around, at all the people in the town square.

"With all these people watching?"

"Sure!"

"Doctor I think we should wait-,"

"Nonsense Rory, there's no time like the present." And with that the Doctor took off running. The kids followed behind him, Amy laughing, Rory looking dubious and slightly put-off. "WHAT KIND OF GAME SHALL WE PLAY? QUICK! SAY THE FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND!" The doctor screamed as he ran through the park.

"TIGERS!" Amy shouted back.

"Umm . . . Knights?" Rory panted as he ran.

"BALLOON ANIMALS!" The doctor exclaimed in glee.

"Doctor can we stop running?" Rory asked, wheezing.

"NEVE-," The doctor started to say as he tripped on his own feet, lanky arms flailing in the air. After the kids had helped him up, they decided that Amy was to be the night protecting Rory the balloon animals against the Doctor, who was a tiger. This resulted in the Doctor, running around the park on all fours, Rory angrily yelling "SQUEEK!" and not allowed to say anything else, and Amy, the twig knight with her wonderful sword of branch, infused with the magical powers of Gallifrey. Soon people stopped to watch, at first odd glances were cast their way, and soon they had an audience. The three friends didn't even notice this, however. They were lost in a world with robots and castles, thorny cages and adventure. Only after they had finished playing and their audience started to clap did they realize they were being watched. They did what came naturally to them. Amy and the Doctor bowed. Rory just stood there, awkwardly blushing. The doctor then took the children to get ice cream and a mother came up to him, her two year old in tow.

"You are such a wonderful parent, playing with your children like that." The doctor was taken aback.

"Oh . . . These aren't my . . . Erm . . . they . . . I'm babysitting."

"Oh! I'm sorry! Say could I get your number? Maybe you could babysit Clara sometime!" The doctor looked down at little Clara, her cheeks were chubby, her hair was black, and she had a sleepy glazed look in her eyes.

"Um, I'm sorry; it's just a onetime thing for a friend you see. . ."

"That's a shame. You seem like such a joy for the kids." The doctor smiled and nodded his thanks, and then with ice cream in hand, the three walked home. Rory said goodbye as it was getting dark out, and Amy and the Doctor ordered Chinese takeout for dinner and played board games until Amy fell asleep on the board. The doctor carried her up the stairs to her room and laid her in bed, pulling the covers over her tiny form.

"Goodnight Amelia." He whispered, as he left the room.


	5. Chapter 5

**Woo! Another chapter! I don't even know why I'm writing this anymore, I just can't stop. Ps. there is a sort of subplot in each chapter, like a hidden meaning behind each one. It's not a particularly bright one either. If you can guess what it is, leave it in the comments, and if you get it right, I'll write a fic of your choice. Oh and I kind of forgot to mention before chapter 3, chapter 3 will make a lot more sense if you've seen the "Good Night" Minisode. Andddd yeah that's Clara in chapter 4. Well enjoy! As always, let me know what you think.**

**Chapter 5**

It had been five days now. Five days on earth without his TARDIS. The doctor's thoughts started to get colored a tad darker. How long could he keep this up? Amy's aunt would be back soon, and then what? He couldn't stay here much longer . . . when he said goodbye this time, it would really be their last and final goodbye. There was no going back after that. The doctor seemed to wake up that morning to these thoughts flying around his head like angry little Daleks. He rubbed his face and pushed his hair back away from his head in agitation. He didn't want these thoughts. He needed something to distract him from the burning of tears already forming in his eyes. Earth wasn't distracting enough for this.

"AMY WAKE UP!" The doctor shouted from the foot of her bed. Amy sat up and rubbed her eyes sleepily. She yawned and mumbled,

"Yes doctor?"

"We're going to go on an adventure!" That got her awake.

"Where to?"

"To space. I think today is as good a day as any to get in the TARDIS and fly off into space!"

"I thought you said no space for this trip?"

"I changed my mind." Her face lit up. "Get dressed, put on something warm because we're going to the winter planet. It never stops snowing there and you can build all kinds of ice sculptures and palaces and we can go ice skating and it is going to be wonderful!" Amy rushed out of bed and in no time they were standing, hand in hand in front of the TARDIS. The doctor snapped his fingers and those wonderful blue doors swung open.

They didn't end up in the snow planet. When the TARDIS landed they ended up on the exact opposite of a snow planet. There was fire and volcanoes everywhere. The doctor shrugged, and took off his wooly jacket. Amy threw her hat and scarf down on the TARDIS floor.

"There's always exploring to be done." He said, and with a flourish opened the doors, and stepped out onto the craggily surface of the planet, Amy in tow. They walked a little ways away from the TARDIS, making sure to avoid hot steam coming out of the ground. An alarm sounded somewhere. "That's almost never a good sign. Back in the TARDIS Amy." The Doctor said, taking the girl's hand and running back towards his blue box. But they were too late. Legions of creatures riding other creatures descended upon them.

"WHO TRESPASSES HERE?" A strong female voice asked. The Doctor spun around and tried to identify the speaker. Finally he found her, a ten foot tall alien wearing full battle armor. It wasn't even a species he recognized. Her skin was yellow with purple stripes, and her eyes were red and slanted, with pointed teeth. She rode an even bigger thing that looked like a deadly mutant mixture between a rhinoceros and a triceratops.

"Yes hello, I'm the Doctor and this is Amy, we were just leaving." He tried to explain, wishing that, just for once, that line would work.

"TAKE THEM TO THE TOWER!"

"Where's the tower? What's that? Is it some sort of welcoming center?" He asked, once again hopeful. But when the other ten foot tall aliens approached them with cuffs, the Doctor started to get unsure. He wrapped an arm around Amy's shoulder. "Can't you see I'm with a young child! Surely you can tell I mean you no harm!" He shouted, just wishing to get back in his TARDIS and fly away. This was a mistake; he shouldn't have brought Amy here. He should've just stayed on earth. What if something happened to her? Two aliens started to attempt to pull Amy away from him.

"DOCTOR!" she shouted, her little hands reaching out for him. He tried to grab hold of her, but an Alien came up from behind him and cuffed him and pulled him away.

"AMY! DON'T WORRY! I'LL SAVE YOU! I WON'T LET YOU GO!" It turned out the tower was a jail cell of sorts. The Doctor couldn't see or hear Amy, he was locked up inside a small square cage with only one little slot in it, and it wasn't even big enough for him to stand up in. "AMY!" He tried shouting. No response. The square must've been hanging, because every time he moved the whole thing seemed to swing. Everything was hot, he was sweating. He couldn't get the image of Amy being taken from him out of his mind. She had looked so afraid. This was his fault. What if he lost her again? He couldn't do this. He couldn't get out of this cell. He couldn't save them. It was impossible. He curled up in a ball, not knowing what to do. Since when was he so helpless? Normally he was the one with the plan, the one who never gave up. The determined, the terrifying oncoming storm. All he felt right now was utter hopelessness. It was as if the pain he felt in his hearts consumed him whole. And then she was there again.

_Goodbye raggedy man._ He started to cry, his tears cold compared to the heat of his skin.

"Doctor snap out of it!" A familiar voice sounded from outside his cube. He looked up, the motion of doing so causing the whole thing to sway again.

"River?" He asked, thinking it couldn't possibly be . . .

"Hello sweetie." She answered before there was a loud _BANG!_ And the cube was blown to bits. The Doctor landed in a hovercraft flown by none other than the brilliant Professor River Song. He looked around, they seemed to be in a volcano of sorts, with loads of boxes on chains dangling over hot lava. River was dressed in a sparkly purple gown that was short and ruffled, her hair done up with crystals in it.

"Where did you come from?" She grinned over her shoulder.

"Never mind that." She started to fly the hovercraft up and forward, aiming towards the smaller cubes hanging higher up. "What were you thinking bringing Amy here?" She asked, anger sounding in her voice.

"I thought an adventure would be nice . . ."

"Oh, so naturally you decided to bring her to the flognemises, the patron planet of war."

"Erm . . . well we were hoping for a snow planet . . ."

"Doctor you need to let her go." His breath seemed to whizz out of his lungs.

"I . . . can't."

"You could've just gotten her killed, and if she dies, I don't exist. Do you have any idea what kind of chaos that would cause?" She asked, flying from cube to cube and scanning each with some sort of screen within the hovercraft.

"I know. I shouldn't have . . . I was wrong."

"You were very wrong." River's scanner beeped. "Got her. Get ready to catch her."

"Alright." The doctor stood up, wobbling a little in the unstable hover craft "AMY WE'RE GOING TO GET YOU OUT OF THERE!"

"D-doctor?" a little voice sounded. The doctor wanted to beat himself up over how afraid she seemed to be. Just by that one little word. He could tell she had been crying.

"THAT'S RIGHT AMY! YOU'RE GOING TO HEAR A LOUD BOOM AND THEN YOU'RE GOING TO FALL, BUT I'M GOING TO CATCH YOU ALRIGHT?"

"Alright!" River shot some sort of laser at the cube and Amy came flying out of it, she was too far. The doctor stretched out as far as he could, on his tip toes, his arms extended to their maximum length. Amy screamed. He caught one of her hands as her body hit the side of the hover craft and was left to dangle over the lava. She was crying, their hands were both sweaty from the heat and slipping. The doctor reached out his other hand, nearly falling out of the hovercraft himself.

"DON'T LET GO!" She shouted. The doctor looked at his best friend, tears in her eyes, her face shiny and dirty, and still saw it there, the hope. She still believed he would save her. His best friend, a little girl, dangling over lava, knew even then that he would save her. He couldn't lose her again. Not like this. She was slipping, slipping away so fast.

"DOCTOR!" River screamed, helpless at the control panel.

"I'M TRYING!" He yanked with all his might, Amy's other hand came up and clutched onto his sleeve and finally he was able to lurch her up the rest of the way. The doctor pulled Amy into his arms and held her tight as she cried a little into his jacket and River flew them all out of harm's way. Once they were safely back in the TARDIS, River flew them to another random drop off location. She kissed the Doctor goodbye and knelt down in front of Amy.

"You were so brave." River told her mother.

"No I wasn't. I cried and screamed like a baby."

"Bravery isn't the lack of fear, Amy. Bravery is the courage to overcome that fear. And you did just that." Amy smiled.

"Thank you for saving us." River gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Anytime." River stood to leave and Amy called out,

"I hope I'm as pretty as you someday." River turned and grinned, tears in her eyes.

"You'll be even prettier." The Doctor waved at his wife as she left his TARDIS once again, and then he flew the old girl back to the afternoon they had left.

"No more space adventures for a while." He told Amy. She nodded in agreement. "It's not always like that by the way . . . but for now we'd better play it safe." Amy consented and they exited the TARDIS together. That night as Amy slept upstairs, the Doctor lay, curled up on the couch. _His_ Amy wouldn't have gotten trapped like that. His Amy would've given those aliens hell and refused to be imprisoned. His Amy wouldn't have cried. This wasn't his Amy. This was a little girl. He had lost his Amy, and he was soon to lose this one too. What would he do then? He would be alone all over again. He didn't think he could stand it.

_Goodbye raggedy man._ And with that thought in his mind, he was unable to sleep the rest of the night, he just lay awake, mourning the loss of his friends.


	6. Chapter 6

**I'm sorry it has taken me this long to update the story! The final chapter shall be out shortly, as I already have most of it written. I hope you enjoy! As always, reviews are welcome! **

**Chapter 6**

The doctor stared up at the ceiling, his eyes weary from lack of sleep. He wondered at that. Why was he so tired? He didn't need as much sleep as humans. This was ridiculous. The past few days he had been sleeping like a human, and now that he had broken that cycle he felt awful. Maybe it was this lack of sleep that led him to a very very dangerous thought.

He had a time machine. He could bring her back. For a moment his mind flashed to Rose and her father. No, that wouldn't happen to him. Somehow he could work around the time stream. Somehow he would go back and fix this. Little Amy couldn't know. He rushed out to the TARDIS and decided to come back on this exact day, no time would pass for Amy. She was still asleep anyway. He rushed into the control room and typed in the date. The old girl seemed to groan, she didn't want to go. She knew what this meant. The Doctor put his hands on the control panel.

"Please. Please do this for me. I know I ask a lot of you . . . but please." After a moment of silence, the engines whirled to life. The doctor smiled softly at his TARDIS. His best friend, his constant companion. After a troublesome landing, with only two explosions, the doctor peeked his head out of the TARDIS doors. It was earlier that day, in the park so that he wouldn't see his own TARDIS. He rushed to the graveyard. He had a plan. He was going to stare at the angel the entire time. Rory wouldn't go, and then Amy wouldn't follow suit. They would both be saved. He found it, in the graveyard, only a few minutes before they were set to appear. He knelt behind a tombstone and peered around just enough to stare at the angel. He waited. Soon there they were, sitting up, taking big gulps of air because they had just jumped off a building after all. His courageous Ponds. The Doctor watched himself rush over to them, he watched River following along behind him. And then something terrible happened, River glanced over at him. Not the him that she was standing next to. The him that was hiding behind the gravestone, staring at the angel. A frown appeared on her face, but she said nothing. A moment later, Rory was in front of the gravestone with his name on it. It was almost time. River looked back over at him and shook her head very slightly. She knew. She knew what he was doing here, she knew that he shouldn't be here. She knew his plan. His glorious River Song. She always knew. Tears stung in his eyes. She was right. If he prevented their death, all of time and space might fall apart. And for a moment he hated himself. He hated himself for being too selfless to care about this. If he saved his friends, the universe might fall apart. But so what? Wasn't that a worthy price to pay? He loved them so very much. He watched as the words began to leave Rory's lips. Those fatele last words. The last words he would ever hear his best mate say.

"Hey look, this has my name-," and here was his chance, his chance to save them but possible lose the universe in return. River's eyes burned with rage and sadness. She mouthed the word. That one horrible instruction he wanted to give everything not to follow.

_BLINK._ The universe or the Ponds? He cast one more sad gaze over at River, before he finally did what he asked, what he knew was right. He blinked. He sat with his back against the tombstone and his eyes closed as he heard the sound of Amy realizing her husband was dead. Amy realizing what she must do to see him again. He realized there was one thing he could do. River had stared at that angel for him. River had watched her parents die, but held in her reaction so that he would have time to grieve. He looked back at the angel, allowing River to take her eyes off of it. She glanced at him gratefully as her mother vanished too, the words that had been echoing in his mind for the past five days echoing over again.

"Goodbye raggedy man." Tears burned in his vision, but he withstood them, allowing River to place her face in her hands and silently sob as he fell to his knees in anguish beside her. And then they got back in the TARDIS and vanished, only one more look from River over her shoulder, a look of thanks.

The TARDIS sat him back down in Amy's backyard that morning. He felt exhausted, body and mind. He wanted to collapse. He felt as though he couldn't breathe. The world was slowly closing in around him. They were really and truly gone, and there was nothing he would ever be able to do about it. His footsteps were so heavy he felt as if he couldn't take another. He stood in the middle of the yard, staring at everything and nothing, his whole world constricting in despair. And then soft footsteps on the grass. He looked up to see little Pond racing towards him. She threw her arms around him, and he placed a hand on her hair.

"I heard the TARDIS, I thought you had left a day early."

"Oh. . ." He mumbled. She looked up at him.

"Doctor? What's the matter?" The Doctor knelt down on the ground in front of her and hugged her to him.

"I've just lost someone very dear to me Amy, and I've been mourning their loss all week." Amy put a tiny hand to his face.

"I know just the thing." She pulled him to his feet and took him inside, tugging on his hand. She sat him down, made him some chamomile tea, and got out a big book with a leather cover and jewels decorating the front. She cuddled into his side on the couch, and opened the book.

"Chapter one . . ." she began reading to him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, so I couldn't stop writing it today. But hey, it's done! Yay! Next I'm thinking either Les Miserables or Sherlock. **

**Chapter 7**

The book ended up being something Amy's aunt had given her after her parents had died. It was a book about how to get over the loss of a loved one. The doctor listened to his best friend read it. It was a very long story, about a girl whose family had died and left her all alone in the world. Then a big blue fairy appeared and taught her how to move on.

"Think of all the good times you've had." Amy read. The doctor thought back. Pirates, running, laughter around a table, popping out of Rory's cake at his stag party. There were so many times they were afraid, that they couldn't see a way out. But they always found one.

"Think of all those quiet moments where you just looked at each other and felt grateful to have them in your life." There were many of those quiet, unspoken moments. He had truly loved his friends.

"Know that they are in a better place now. All of the bad things that happened to them in life are erased. They are free from hardships, from injuries, from anything bad. Now they are angels, floating up above and smiling down at you from puffy white clouds." The doctor tried to imagine his friends as angels. They would make lovely angels. Amy in all white, big wings coming from her back, a golden light shining around her and her wonderful smile playing out on her face. Rory as a courageous angel, holding a flaming sword. They were together, wherever they were. They would always be together, at least there was that. The doctor felt himself crying yet again.

"The end." Amy read, closing the book. She looked up at her friend, at the tears shining on his face.

"Are you sad it's over?" The doctor nodded his head and held little Amy to him. "You know what my Dad always told me about endings?" The doctor was sobbing now.

"What?" He asked, smiling at his best friend.

"It's never really over. When you've gone all the way to the end and there is no more left, just flip back to the beginning." The doctor wondered how Amy could be so smart at so young. How did she already know him well enough to know what this was about, in her own little way?

"I think . . . I think that's what I've been doing Amy." She kissed his cheek and hugged him tight.

"I know Doctor . . . sometimes we lose people we love, and when we do, we want to just hold them and never let them go. But there comes a time when you need to. You need to let go."

"Amy . . ." Amy took his hand and led him out to the backyard, to his magnificent blue box.

"Go find another adventure Doctor, go save planets and change lives. And be happy while you do it. For me. I'll be fine, Auntie comes back tomorrow and I've been alone longer than that before." She hugged him again, and knowing she was right; the Doctor slowly opened the door to his TARDIS and turned back one last time. He approached her and knelt down.

"Amy . . . I have one last thing. A message for you." Little Amy nodded. "If you're patient, the days are coming that you will never forget." His eyes brimmed up with tears again, how could two hearts contain all this sorrow? ". . . You'll . . . You'll go to sea and fight pirates. You'll fall in love with a man who will wait 2000 years to keep you safe. You will give hope to the greatest painter that ever lived. And save a whale in outer space. This is the story of Amelia Pond. You are a magnificent, glorious human being. And you are going to be destined for great things. You are going to change the course of history, you are going to inspire others with your courage and strong will and above all else your hope. You always hope for the best little Amelia Pond. Because Hope is your strongest asset. Never stop hoping." He hugged her tightly to him one last time.

"Is all that really going to happen?" She asked her eyes full of wonder.

"All that and so much more. Goodbye Amy."

"Until next time Doctor!"

"Until next time, my best friend, my family." And then he got in his TARDIS, and flew away, through all of time and space, never to see his Pond again. But she would see him again, oh yes. And she would soon live the greatest adventure of all. But don't let this ending make you sad; because once you reach the end, you have the pleasure of starting over, of flipping back and enjoying those moments all over again. And the pleasure of enjoying the journey, each and every time you take it.


End file.
